


She IS Real!

by cjayne



Series: blue boa man [1]
Category: Detroit Evolution - Fandom
Genre: F/M, LAZZO HAS A GIRLFRIEND, M/M, Octopunk Media's Detroit: Evolution Fan Film, Post-Octopunk Media's Detroit: Evolution Fan Film, Swearing, Temporary Amnesia, betting (its only $20 tho), lazzo is a huge marvel fan, probably very inaccurate sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:55:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26376871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cjayne/pseuds/cjayne
Summary: After months of pretending he has a girlfriend, Lazzo has to find himself one to prove Gavin and Nines wrong- and he does it in the strangest way possible. Because it's Lazzo.
Relationships: Lazzo Fratello/Lazzo Fratello's Android Girlfriend, Upgraded Connor | RK900/Gavin Reed
Series: blue boa man [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1956400
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	She IS Real!

"She **is** real, I promise!" Lazzo practically screamed at the two detectives, who were both failing miserably to remain professional. At best, they were laughing their hearts out. At worst, they were mere seconds away from crashing into traffic because not even Nines could drive straight with the amount he was giggling.

Gavin and Nines were driving Lazzo back to his college campus after he'd been brought into the DPD for probably 5th time in the past few months. They had started their teasing about his mystery partner when he'd phoned his 'girlfriend' to ask her to pick him up, but his mother had arrived.

(Gavin swears that he's never seen Nines laugh so much. Nines says that Gavin pulled a brilliant face that he's going to save for blackmail.)

Obviously, this had led to an ongoing inside joke about whether she was actually real, and a debate about who he was stealing parts for. Lazzo had been caught by the detectives for stealing a hand multiple times, which in and of itself was strange, but even more so when he claimed it was for his supposed girlfriend. Even Tina was convinced she didn't exist. Nines had tried to find her on social media but Lazzo claimed that she didn't have any accounts, and he said that Nines 'shouldn't risk getting fired or some shit' when he wanted to illegally find out her number.

"Why don't you bring her round to see us one day?" Nines proposed.

 _Oh shit_. Lazzo hadn't prepared for this. He'd created a what he thought was a very convincing story about her: they'd met at a school sports event where he was playing the saxophone and she was cheerleading. He'd even stolen- no, borrowed- one of the ones from the music hall to get a photo with it, just incase he needed to prove it. Their first date was to the cinema, to see the latest Marvel film (he prefers the older Avengers though, and his favourite is Iron Man) and then they went to a restaurant. They often went for walks to local parks because she loved the colours of the flowers and the bird's songs.

(She also _definitely_ wasn't based on his crush. Not at all.)

But he hadn't prepared for Nines- a fricking police officer- wanting to meet her. He didn't even seem to want to see her just to know she existed. He wanted to see her because she sounded nice. 

It may have been due to him being wiped out. Or liking Nines and Gavin. Or the headache he had because of the shitty music they had blasted for the previous 20 minutes. But Lazzo said yes.

"Can you do Saturday?" Lazzo asked, slightly- no, extremely- worried about what he'd just signed up for.

"We can do any day to be honest," Gavin laughed. "It'd probably do us some good to take time off this case. I don't want this tin can overworking his processors too much," he said with a smirk to his partner, who was badly concealing a grin by concentrating on the road ahead.

"Gavin and I shall be at his apartm-"

"- _Our_ apartment," Gavin sharply cut in.

"-At _our_ apartment by 6pm. And I'm sure we can order pizzas if you want."

"Yes! Please! But I'm just gonna say that you'd better fucking be okay with pineapple on pizza, or I'm gonna have to decline."

Gavin opened his mouth to argue, but Nines helpfully drove into a drop-off point for Lazzo's school compound, ending that war before it started.

"Oh look we're here," Gavin said dryly, although a smile played on his lips.

"So uh.. see you Saturday?" Lazzo said as he stepped out of the car.

"Well I hope not earlier," Nines winked.

As Lazzo was walking off, he faintly heard Gavin shouting "this girlfriend better be real!"

 _She'd better_ , Lazzo thought, _she'd better_.

Lazzo wandered slowly, half-forming plans in his head before he looked at his phone and was slightly surprised by the time- 6:30am. He quickened into a jog, realising his roommate would be up soon; they always went for a morning run, and Lazzo swears he'll join in one day. He didn't want to freak them out, although he supposed they were used to it by now.

Fumbling for his keys, Lazzo thought he heard a familiar voice muffled through the walls of his room. _God, the staff had better not found out._

It didn't stop him bursting through the door like there was a murderer behind him. 

It also didn't stop him crashing head-first into Lauren. The love of his life.

Not that he realised it was her of course- they were both knocked out as soon as they collided. Now they were lying on the floor, and poor Austyn- Lazzo's roommate- had to come up with an excuse for them being in such a way.

After a fumbled explanation about him having a nightmare and her coming to help him that the teachers only pretended to believe, the two kids ended up in hospital.

\---

Lazzo was the first to wake. To wake to the sounds of beeping monitors and people shuffling around that could only be from a hospital. He'd only been there once- he broke his arm when he was in sixth grade by falling off the monkey bars- but it was undeniably the hospital.

Lazzo was the first to wake and find himself in an ugly ass gown that was way too thin and made him pretty damn cold. 

Lazzo was the first to wake and to be greeted by a doctor, who told him what had happened and that he was lucky; he only had a minor concussion and as long as he passed a few tests, he could go home today.

Lauren was the second to wake. To wake to a deafening silence before her audio processors kicked into gear with a screech and suddenly she could hear beeping monitors and people shuffling around. It sounded like.. a hospital?

Lauren was the second to wake, to see that her skin had retracted from as much of her body as she could see (her face still looked normal) and that a cheap blanket had been placed over her, 'for privacy' she assumed. A fucking blanket? They needed to step up their game.

Lauren was the second to wake and to be greeted by someone wearing a white lab coat- a doctor or nurse, then- and to be told what had happened. She couldn't remember a thing. She was told of two people called 'Lazzo' and 'Austyn' and that her and this Lazzo dude had collided and they'd both been knocked out.

 _Poor guy_ , she thought. _Although headbutting an android **is** a stupid idea_.

She was told she had been concussed, and that she was suffering from a case of amnesia. The doctor rambled on, but basically she had forgotten a ton of memories. But, they would start returning within the next few hours. It would take up to 3 days to regain memories of her whole life. She'd be taken home and would have to be looked after someone for a couple of days.

She was left on her own, trying to process all the new information, when a boy appeared at her door, seemingly wanting to enter. _Must be that Lazzo dude_. She nodded at him and he carefully entered the room, tip-toeing over any cables as he made his way to the chair on the right of her bed. She hadn't noticed it, nor had she noticed the glass of thirium on the table which she reached over to take a sip out of.

"Hey," she said. Lazzo was clearly nervous for whatever reason, twiddling with his thumbs and avoiding eye contact.

"..Hi," he managed. They sat in silence for a minute or two.

"So, are you Lazzo?"

"Me? Lazzo? Yep.. yeah that's me."

"And how do I know you?"

Lazzo looked at her quizzically.

"Oh.. yeah. I've got robot amnesia. Forgotten memories, come back after a bit, that sorta thing."

The cogs in Lazzo's brain were quite clearly spinning as he stared at her.

"Oh my god. Uh. Hi. Then. I'm Lazzo."

Lauren stifled a smile at him. "Hi Lazzo, I'm Lauren."

"You don't need to tell me who you are, I didn't lose my memories" he laughed, although his mind was clearly elsewhere.

You could literally see when he got a lightbulb moment. His eyes lit up, his eyebrows raised, he tilted his head to the side slightly.

"I'm your boyfriend."

"You and me.. are dating?"

"Yes that's what that means, dumbass."

"Hey... that's kinda mean to say to someone's who's just been concussed." She tried to look angry but they both just laughed. And it could have been the side effects of being knocked out, but she felt a sort of tangled sensation near her thirium pump. She decided to ignore it. Lazzo clearly wasn't a doctor.

"I've just been concussed too!" He tried to say with exasperation before he burst out laughing again.

It took a few minutes for him to regain his composure, but once he did he said that he'd look after her for as long as she needed 'because that's what boyfriends do'. He then had to get checked up on, so he dashed back to his ward. _Hypocrite_ , she thought to herself with a smile.

Time passed quickly as Lauren waited for someone to come and give her a checkup, but only because she was lost in her own head, thinking. She was desperate to know of her and Lazzo's relationship. She could see why she liked him- he seemed kind and had soft-looking dark hair that complimented his hazel brown eyes. What stood out to her the most though was how determined he was to make her smile and laugh. It warmed something inside of her that she wasn't sure even existed until now.

The doctor _eventually_ came and gave her the heads up that she only had to clear two more tests before she could go home- goddamn, it sounded like school!- and then Lazzo appeared again, this time to tell her about some movie that just came out and that it would be a great plan to watch it together once they're both fully recovered.

That tangled sensation from before arose and Lauren mentally cursed herself for not asking the doctor. Oh well, it hadn't killed her yet, it'd be fine. The doctor would've- _should've_ \- told her if something was an issue, whether related to her amnesia or not.

After a few more hours of waiting and chatting, she was free to go. What she hadn't considered was _where_ she was going to go.

"You could always come back to mine," Lazzo offered with a shrug. "I'm sure my roommate could bunk with someone else for a bit."

"And if I were to say yes, how long would this be for?" She still had her doubts, though they were few, about Lazzo.

Kidnapping her didn't exactly seem out of his limits, however soft he seemed. _Knocking me out and risking his own health is a bit of a fucking stupid plan_. _Must be his first try_.

(She hadn't kidnapped anyone before, not that she'd remember. It was probably something from an action movie that had stuck in her head. What a great use of her selective memory.)

"I..I hadn't thought of that. Maybe we could just see how you are after a week or s-"

"A week?!"

Lazzo stumbled back from in front of Lauren, having not thought through the fact that he was inviting this girl around for potentially a week even though she didn't have a clue who he was until he claimed to be her boyfriend.

"Shit, okay, sorry.. you don't have to stay at all if you don't want to, that was overstepping the mark, I'm sor-."

"Hey hey hey, calm down, Lazzo," Lauren said in a gentle voice that shouldn't make Lazzo's heart wrench as much as it does. "I only woke up a few hours ago so I'm probably a bit delusional-" she paused as they both laughed- "but can we just see how we _both_ get on? Sure, we can plan for a week, but we don't have to stick to that. You still had a fucking concussion."

Lazzo looked at her. At Lauren, the love of his life. The girl he had been pining over (much to Austyn's annoyance) for like, eight months??? telling him in not so many words that she wanted him to be safe. For them to be safe _together_.

"Of course," he beamed.

"You wanna get in the taxi then?" She gestured to the auto-cab-thingy-whatsit that was parked on the curb next to them, with the little screen showing the fee slowly ticking up.

He laughed and shook his head. "Fuck, yeah, let's do that."

\---

Lauren had been at Lazzo's for exactly 2 days and 13 hours when she fully regained her memories. And she was confused.

According to her memories, Lazzo was an annoying kid who always tried too hard to be nice (especially to her). He always put in 100% effort, and he had to, because his grades were.... not the best, to say the least. He always offered to do the dirty work, finding- or at least, trying to find- spare android parts whenever her or her friends needed replacements. She remebered that although she liked him, her friend group said that he was really dodgy and that she shouldn't go anywhere near him in case he turned out to be some sick twisted murderer. And at the time, she had thought that fair enough. Now though... she couldn't imagine believing those things.

Also apparently he looked at her _a lot_. And got really nervous when talking to her for some reason.

"Lazzo!" She shouted. She needed to talk about this now, for both their sakes.

"Gimme a sec I wanna eat my toast!" He shouted back, seemingly with his mouth full. God, he was so weird.

Only a minute or two later, he came through to her room and sat down on the side of her bed, swinging his legs like he was gonna fly away. He did it when he was anxious, Lauren had noticed.

"So I've gotten pretty much all my memories back," she started, pretending she didn't notice the colour vacate Lazzo's face. "And they're not.. they don't match up with what you've told me."

Lazzo had suddenly taken an interest to a speck of fluff on the ground and was seemingly having a staring contest with it.

After too long of uncomfortable silence, they both sighed and spoke.

"I'm not mad at yo-"

"Look I'm sorr-"

"I just wan-"

"I had this pla-"

"I don't care babe."

Lazzo could've withstood a magnitude 6 earthquake as he stood glued to the ground, mouth agape, only remembering how to breathe at just the last moment.

Lauren, however, was looking at him with the most honest face she could produce. Sincerely, she said it again: "I don't care."

"You.. don't? You don't care that I lied to you? You're just gonna forget that-" he waved his hand around in the air- "I made all that shit up?"

"I'm not going to forget it, Lazzo," she said as she stood up from the bed and circled so she was directly infront of Lazzo, "But no, I don't care."

"You're a good guy. I know that now. I was caught up in a web, a web of lies that didn't let me see _you_. See who Lazzo Fratello, school's 'most wanted criminal' really was. I can't believe myself, how I didn't thank you for helping me and my friends out. And I'm sorry. That I didn't give you a chance, that I disregarded you as some kind of trash."

"I _am_ trash though. I.. I forced this role on you and you wanna take it and run with it? Doesn't make any sense."

Lauren bent down and cupped his cheek, and Lazzo leaned into the touch with a relieved breath, placing his hand over her slowly retracting skin.

"Nothing in this world makes sense, Lazzo. We've just gotta make the most out of it."

He pushed himself carefully off the bed, clinging onto her hand like if he let go he'd never be able to touch it again. 

"If that's the case then, I wanna kiss you," he smiled.

So he did just that.

And as they kissed she had that tangling near her thirium pump and decided it was love.

\---

Lauren had been at Lazzo's for exactly 4 days and 10 hours when she was trying to decide what dress to wear. It was 5:43pm on Saturday, and the day that they were due to visit Gavin and Nines.

Lazzo hadn't bothered with his outfit, opting for his cleanest jeans, Marvel t-shirt and black jacket. Lauren however, wanted to impress Gavin and Nines, so was currently modelling a red dress with black laced detailing in the middle of Lazzo's bedroom.

Said room was _covered_ in movie posters and little collectible figurines, almost all of which were Marvel themed (of course). He had about 5 different Iron Man posters, a Spiderman poster (signed by the actor) and a poster which had lots of different Marvel comics on. In addition, he had each of the Original 6 as funko-pop figures (knock-offs, of course) and a few action-man style characters.

Lauren had quickly found out about this part of his life, and so had browsed the internet for lots of facts to tell Lazzo, although he had forbidden her from just downloading the films in her head and watching them without him.

"I mean whatever you wear looks great," Lazzo said with a smile. He wasn't exactly wrong, but she needed _actual_ advice.

"You too," she chirped back. "And anyway, this one might be too fancy."

"Yeah, you don't wanna be spilling pizza on that.. wait, you don't eat. Dammit."

Lauren was standing with her hands on her hips in a 'thanks for reminding me that I can't enjoy the thing that you talk about 24/7' face.

"Well I bet they could make you some sort of thirium cocktail," he shrugged.

"Ooh that does sound good. Gimme a sec, I think this next one's better." She dashed out of the room, leaving Lazzo to wonder whether thirium cocktails actually existed of if he just invented something awesome. (After a quick search he was quite disappointed.)

She came back in after a few minutes in a cute majenta purple jumpsuit that had a sweetheart neckline and seemed to gather slightly at the waist. It was in a silk-like fabric, so it flowed over the natural-yet-manmade curves of her body. Lazzo's mouth dropped embarrasingly low.

"Looks.. nice," he managed to say, still admiring how Lauren was posing like she was at Paris fashion week.

"Nice?! You're charming."

"No I-"

"Don't worry," she laughed, "I'm just teasing you."

"How the hell do you get all these nice clothes?" Lazzo asked after he recovered from laughing. "Or.. do I not wanna know?"

"I made them myself," Lauren announced. "But yeah.. the textiles department might've mysteriously lost some fabric."

Lazzo reluctantly dragged his eyes away from her, only to look at the clock and be surprised by the time.

"Shit we're gonna be late." He cursed and grabbed his phone from where it was lying beside him. "You need to grab a bag?"

"I've got everything I need right here," she said as she moved to gently brush his forehead with a kiss.

\---

Gavin and Nines were rushing around their apartment to make it somewhat presentable. It wasn't usually this much of a mess, but they'd been working a lot recently and so didn't actually spend much time at home. 

"So do you reckon he's actually gonna turn up with a girlfriend?" Gavin asked Nines as he set their Roomba to begin cleaning.

"I actually do. Despite your.. doubts about his story, I think it's quite promising. He's a nice person, and there's no other reason for him to just be stealing hands."

"Fair, fair. Still don't believe it, but I guess it checks out." He paused as he folded a blanket up and draped it over the large sofa in the middle of the living room. "Tell you what? $20 says he doesn't have a girlfriend."

"You want to bet on whether Lazzo has a girlfriend?" Nines questioned.

"Yeah." Gavin shrugged. "I don't see why not, since you're so sure he's telling the truth."

"You know you can't pull out of this? I can record everything I see and hear."

"Yeah, yeah, you're the greatest android ever I get it," Gavin laughed as he walked over to Nines, who was attempting to make the warzone of the kitchen a little more civilised.

Nines turned around to look his boyfriend in his eyes, and his skin on his hand immediately retracting as it often did when he was around Gavin. His partner took his hand and interlocked their fingers, taking in the beauty of smooth metal against rough skin like he didn't see it everyday.

Nines guided their hands up to Gavin's face and leaned in towards him when three loud knocks resounded from the hallway, making Gavin jump backwards slightly before leaning in to seal the kiss.

"Fuckin' hell," he said as he pulled away and walked down the hall to welcome Lazzo in.

On the other side of the door, Lazzo was pacing from side to side. Had he got the date wrong? Had he missed a message? Had he wasted time where he could be explaining the interpersonal relationships of the Avengers to Lauren?

Lauren was just trying to calm him down by holding his hand and rubbing her thumb in circles, but it wasn't helping. She was entirely aware of Lazzo's confrontation with Gavin and Nines earlier in the week that had led them to this point, so she totally understood why Lazzo was as nervous as he was.

They had stood by the door for a minute or so whilst Lazzo conjured up the courage to knock on the door; he knew once those three knocks were knocked, he wouldn't be able to back out.

Gavin took embarrasingly long to find the keys, so Nines at least had time to stop the roomba and put it to one side. Gavin eventually pulled the door open and got one of the biggest shocks of his life:

In front of him was Lazzo Fratello **and a girl who was holding his hand**. And he was not, infact, having a dream _or_ a nightmare. He stood and blinked for a second before remembering his manners.

"Uh. Hi, Lazzo and..?"

"Lauren," both Lauren and Lazzo said at the same time, before turning to each other and giggling.

"Well, nice to meet you Lauren. Come on in," he gestured to the hallway and turned his body out of the way.

Nines had a similar reaction to Gavin, but at least he wasn't in full view when he did so. He was loitering in the living room so he could just about see the door; his LED went yellow and he too stood and blinked for a second or so.

Once the younger couple had discarded their jackets on the hooks in the hallway, they had situated themselves on the large sofa directly infront of the television. Nines had handed Lauren a small glass of thirium and Gavin had ordered him and Lazzo each a pizza, and they were now deciding on which film to watch.

Gavin had the remote and was scrolling aimlessly through each of the streaming services in turn when Nines said to Lauren, "Can I just speak to you for a sec? In the other room?" He gestured over to the bedroom.

"Uh yeah. Sure," she replied, rising to her feet. "Maybe they'll have found a movie by then."

Lazzo turned his head in the vague direction of the two androids. "Fuck you," he joked.

"Love you too!"

\---

Lauren sat on the bed with a bounce as Nines stood up straight, hands behind his back, like he were interrogating a murder suspect. It shouldn't have been much surprise that Lauren then looked slightly terrified.

"You're not gonna arrest me or anything?"

"Oh, no Lauren. Sorry- I have a habit of doing that," he laughed and duly relaxed himself. "You probably know how me and Gavin got to know Lazzo?" She nodded. "I was wondering why he keeps trying again? Stealing the arms?"

"Well.. my and most of my friends are androids, and I needed a component replacing. He offered to find it, and did, but then one my friends' hands isstarted malfunctioning. It started about..-"

"-3 months ago?" Nines said.

"Yeah, around then. Lazzo offered to find one, and I guess he kept getting caught by you since he always came back the next morning empty handed... excuse the pun."

"I thought it was quite funny," Nines chuckled. "But yes, we've caught him 5 times now. It's curious to see him still trying, even though he knows he's going to get caught."

"I guess he just wants to help people out. And he _does_ like you guys."

From the other room, Lazzo shouted "NO WAY THAT'S YOU!" to which Gavin yelled "SHUT UP!!".

"They must be having fun," Nines shrugged as Lauren laughed. "Lazzo probably found some old photo of Gavin. Humans get particularly protective over photos of their younger selves, I have discovered."

"I gotta find some of Lazzo then," she said inbetween her laughing, "I bet he had an emo stage that he doesn't want dug up!"

"I'm sure I could dig around and find some if you'd like?"

"Absolutely. Although don't do it now, we should probably go see how they're getting on before they start fighting."

"That'd be a good idea, yes. But please do me a favour: try and keep Lazzo out of crime. I can sort your friend out with a replacement arm, just.. don't let him waste his life away. Please."

"Of course." She smiled, and thanked whoever was controlling her fate that she'd found herself with such caring friends.

Gavin and Lazzo had suprisingly _not_ attacked each other- or at least, Nines couldn't detect any signs that they had- and they'd finished their pizzas and shoved the boxes under the sofa. On the screen was Iron Man, supposedly one of Gavin's favourite films from his childhood.

"Oh, Nines, before I forget," Gavin said as his partner sat down on the smaller- cozier- sofa next to him, "I owe you this-"

He reached into his jeans pocket and pulled out his wallet, brandishing a $20 note and passing it to Nines.

"You fuckers betted on me, didn't you!" Lazzo exclaimed.

Nines smirked as he put the money into his pocket. "Shall we start this movie then, Gavin?"

"Let's," he said, trying his best to keep a straight face as Lazzo stared in disapproval.

Lauren found it hilarious, much to Lazzo's annoyance, and simply reached out to his face and pressed a kiss on his cheek.

**Author's Note:**

> I WROTE OVER 4500 WORDS BECAUSE OF A STUPID CONVERSATION WITH A FRIEND I LOVE IT HERE  
> (its a long story but i'll explain it if someone wants lol)
> 
> anYWAYS i hope you enjoyed, i'll hopefully be writing a follow-up about what Gavin and Lazzo were talking about when we had Lauren and Nines' POV
> 
> kudos and comments are greatly appreciated!! <3


End file.
